(and shout out to Shirley! Thanks for being an absolutely amazing substitute mom, you really went above and beyond and we are so grateful! Kel loved celebrating her birthday at a real home away from home!)
Today was a day to do 2 things:
1) celebrate the birth of one of the most wonderful human beings around
2) finalize our travel plans so that the real party could begin at our next destination
After some Shreddies (boxes bought especially for us-thank you for coming back into our life. yum) we hopped a train to London and then got an underground pass from the day so we could travel around in more of a purposeful way than a wanderer way. We decided to go to The Tower of London for most of the day which was a great idea! We love British history, probably because it is more scandalous and soap opera-ey than any soap opera around today...well except The Tudors which is a soap opera about the English Royals. Love the glam.
We went on a guided tour with Peter the Beefeater. Beefeaters (or Yeoman Warders as they are officially known, they think the Beefeater nickname comes from centuries ago when they were paid in rations of beef...now this sounds like something we might be interested in. Jenny and Kelly...Cakeeaters for the Queen... has a nice ring...) are the guards of the Tower of London and give awesome guided tours. They and their families all live within the walls of the Tower keeping things in order for Her Royal Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II. The Beefeaters are all Royal Army vets who served for at least 22 years and made it to the rank of Sergeant Major...they are surprisingly hilarious! Peter the Beefeater was a real character and he filled us in on all the juicy royal scandals, adultary, beheadings, murders...the usual. Nonetheless, the fact that they live in there still weirds us out.
The Tower of London is essentially a city within a city with buildings that date back to the year 1078. It is surrounded by an inner wall (25 feet thick) with lots of decks to shoot intruders with bows and arrows and and outer wall that had homes, pubs etc. built into it...and still does for the Beefeaters that live there. But they don't shoot peeps anymore... well, we don't think.
It is a very surreal feeling to be somewhere so old and you have to keep constantly reminding yourself that you are walking the same spiral staircases as many kings, queens, prisoners and traitors from history. After seeing a gold punch bowl the size of a jacuzzi tub, we decided we would have never made it down these twisty stairs after a banquet alive (it's hard enough when you're sober, sheesh). You are also walking through pathways where the headless bodies of the 1,500 people executed on the nearby hill were carried to be burried under the chapel...ew. Also glad we weren't in that scenario.
The craziest thing was probably seeing all of the carvings in the walls of the stone rooms...graffiti from prisoners who were kept there while they waited for their public executions. Their last words are clearly visible, some so deeply and ornately carved they obviously had quite a while to await their fate. They cover the walls in some rooms that were obviously used mostly as dungeons - the creepiest ones are from bitter prisoners about betrayal and being able to trust only yourself in life. We guess being chained to the wall of a stone room waiting to die could make anyone pretty bitter and decided these guys were real gentlemen/and ladies of course. Our wall graffiti would have been wayyy ruder if we had been waiting to get our heads chopped off!
We sat in the chapel where under the floor all the remains of the executed prisoners were kept, including Anne Boleyn's, whose lips were apparently still moving in prayer as her eyes darted around for a few seconds after they had cut off her head. Don't know about you, but this really gave us the creeps.
I guess these descriptions are making this bday sound a little morbid, but it was actually awesome and super interesting. And let's not leave out the birthday girl's favorite part: the "bling room" a.k.a. The Crown Jewels (not the pervy kind, pervs). It's probably for the best that we couldn't have our cameras in here or Kel would have pictures to compare all future jewelry to. There were the most perfect dimonds in there the size of a large egg. We befriended one of the jewel guards and he showed us a trick to use the reflections to make it look like you were wearing one of the crazy crowns. They are rimmed with rare weasel fur and one crown that he showed us was worth enough that if broken down it could eliminate over 1/3 of India's poverty in a single day (holy shit this is an expensive hat!)....the irony of this is that the crown was a gift from India who would not accept it back when the UK offered. Needless to say, we would be more than happy to take it off the hands of the Indians or the English - just let us know guys, we don't mind helping out! The guard also told us that the uniforms that each guard is wearing costs about £3,000!!!! And then he gossiped about the royal wedding with us, which seems less like gossip and much more serious after being here learning all of the royal history of these crazy monarchs!
Random fact: If and when Prince Charles takes over the thrown after his mother, Queen Elizabeth II, he will have to start going by the name George because Charles is no good - there were 2 kings named Charles and the first was a traitor and so he got executed and the second had 14 children...except none of them were with his wife. He also told us that if soon to be King George, currently Prince Charles takes the throne then it is suuper expensive to change all the money/royal outfits/ ect.
We left around 6:30pm and went and got some necessities for the next leg of our trip, making it home for a pizza and cake party for Kelly at 9pm (thank you so much Shirley and Tim and Louis! You guys are simply the best!). Wine Kelly and wine Jenny decided to attend the celebrations although they are keeping their appearances few and far between for the next few days. The real party will start on Thursday...
Real armor hats on display at the tower- they were super heavy & attatched to chains... hence the awkward pose and crampy necks.
Yet another great possible career path... our options seem to be endless!
Gringas do British history? Check.
23 at the Tower of London? Not too shabby...
The Tower Bridge
Thank you and Goodnight.
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